A few years ago, while pregnant with M, I told my BFF L to slap me sensible if the day comes that I announce I want baby no. 3.
Well, she's not here now, so I can entertain these thoughts.
I want baby no. 3.
There I said it.
Mike doesn't. He suggested I pray for an immaculate conception. (?)
Why do I want number 3?
1. What if C and M do not get along? At least, they have a back up sibling.
2. What if C or M decide to work out of the country? That leaves us with one kid only. She has to take care of us and she'll be tired. She needs a sub. Enter baby no. 3.
3. Somehow, 5 of us in the family sounds more balanced than 4.
4. M's growing up so fast. I will miss the sound of her little feet on the floor. I will miss her babbling. So my solution is to make a new one.
On the other hand, why am I having second thoughts about baby no. 3?
1. Money. 'Nuff said.
2. Time. It is hard enough dividing my time and attention between two kids. I cannot imagine how to do it with three.
3. Yaya issues.
4. Losing my sanity.
Last but not the least, the most important reason why I do not want to have baby no. 3? The pregnancy. I cannot imagine another nine months spent with a metallic taste in the mouth, aching back, aching ribs, and complete and strict bedrest. The 24/7 urge to throw up. The irritation I have with EVERYBODY. I simply cannot. The pregnancy scares me more than the birthing pain.
Oh wow. I think I just ended my dreams of having baby no. 3 right there! Look at my reasons for wanting versus my reasons for not wanting. The latter sounds more grounded and realistic.
Bye baby no. 3. It was a good 24 hours dreaming of you while it lasted.