Explaining death....

Meet Apple and Orange. :) Apple, the red one, is a fighting fish, a gift our secretary gave to Chloe. Orange, the uhm.. orange one, is the fish Chloe caught during her school fair.


It took her sometime to catch Orange. And before she did, she asked her papa to buy a fishbowl, painted the bowl herself, and waited for it to dry. She wanted to make sure that her new fish will have a ready home waiting.

Unfortunately, Orange passed away this morning. :( And when I told Chloe about it, she cried. :( Cried like there was no tomorrow. :(

I was actually surprised with her reaction. Why? Well, I mentioned in a previous post that Chloe gives me freshly-picked-from-the-compound-garden flowers everyday. And she would see them turn brown and die. And I'd tell her that the flowers are dead and that we have to throw them na. And she'd be okay with it. So I thought, for a 3 year old, Chloe must have understood the concept of death pretty well.

So this morning, I blindly thought she'd just as easily accept Orange's passing away.

ME: Chloe, Orange is not here na. She went to heaven already.
Chloe: Why? Why did she go to heaven?
ME: Because it's time na for her to go.
Chloe: But I love her!!

I went up to our room while Chloe went down na to the garage. Of course, I picked the best time to announce this unfortunate event - this conversation happened minutes before she was to leave for school.

A few seconds later, from our third floor, I heard a loud bawl from the garage.

Chloe: WAAAAAAAAAAH! WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!
*At this point, Mike was giving me the evil eye.
ME: Chloe, don't cry na....
Chloe: Why (sob) is Orange (sob sob) going to heaven?
Chloe: What will she do there? WAAAAAAAAAAAAH!
ME: O sige, let's just get a new Orange for you, okay?
Chloe: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! I donwanuwan!!! I want Orange!!
ME: Okay, let's ask someone to fetch Orange from heaven, okay?
Mike: Chloe, papa will fetch Orange in heaven for you
ME: Uh, NO YOU WILL NOT MIKE!
Chloe: Who's that someone who will fetch Orange?
ME: Secret
Chloe: Why won't you tell me?!?! WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH
ME: It's a surprise. One day, you'll see Orange is back na!!!

This calmed her down a bit. Well, calm enough for Mike to be able to back out of our garage with Chloe quietly sniffling beside him. But when she got to school, she cried again.

Haaaaaaaaay. I want to bonk myself on the head. Can someone please do it for me? How could I have thought that death would be a concept my baby could accept so easily? I'm 30+ years older than her and I still cannot understand it.