Jealousy between siblings.. it's inevitable really. The only question was when it would show up and how it would manifest. Almost a year since Margaux was born, we finally got the answer.
The past few weeks, Chloe has been kicking and screaming on her way to school. No amount of begging, cajoling, bribing and threatening seemed to work. At first, we thought it was just a phase that she'll get over in a few days. But it's been a week and she's still at it. Every morning, a drama scene unfolds in front of our house, as Chloe cries for the whole neighborhood to hear. She doesn't want to go to school, she said. Why? Here are her answers:
1. School is boring.
2. She's having a hard time.
3. One classmate accidentally hit her while the classmate was dancing.
4. A group of girls refuse to play with her. (not true, said teacher)
5. She wants to stay home with shobe.
6. A classroom yaya is mad at her. (again, no truth behind this, accdg. to teacher)
Then teacher told us that Chloe has been going to the bathroom six times in THIRTY MINUTES. To pee. With her UTI history, we brought her in for a long overdue ultrasound of the pelvic area to see if her UTI is back. Nope, everything normal down there, said the pediatric sonologist.
We've sat down with her, spent time with just her, talked with her -- all to no avail. She kept giving us different reasons on why she refuses to go to school.
Until one day, her teacher texted that Chloe finally revealed the real reason why she doesn't want to go to school. She said, it's because I go to work so often. And when I'm at home, I STILL work AND stay with shobe. So she wants to stay at home so that she can be with me AND shobe.
(Insert sound of heart breaking here...)
:(
Reminded me of an article I recently came across in PDI. Something about teaching our children not to be sad over the fact that their parents have to work. I am working for our family business and working for the business that my husband and I started at the same time. I'm still breastfeeding Margaux (and I guess Chloe sees that as time that could've been better spent with her instead). I'm in the middle of preparing a birthday party for Margaux. Yes, I have to admit, in terms of priority, time with Chloe has taken a backseat. Most nights, when she asks me to read her a bedtime story, I have to break up the story in three parts, because my eyes are half closed by the time we get to the happily ever after part. Other nights, I am so delighted with Margaux's new milestones (siting up, standing up, cruising, walking) that I forget about Chloe's own milestones. And when we do notice the new words she knows, it's almost always met with a negative reaction. Because the new words she learns are either from the older kids in our neighborhood or from the yaya (who shares her rich vocabulary of
salitang kanto with our daughter).
For now, Mike and I have been extra careful with how we divide our time with our daughters. We've been paying more attention to Chloe, and have been giving her things to look forward to for finishing school. Like, since she loves being 'the best achi' to Margaux, we told her that when she comes home from school, her task is to tell her shobe EVERYTHING she learned for the day. Or, she can open one surprise AFTER she comes home from school. Subtle, right? Not a direct go-to-school-or-else order.
Here's hoping that the shy green eyed monster will soon go away.
